War Zone- Week 6 Tactics of the Enemy vs. Strategies of the Believer (Loneliness)

Today we will look at another tactic of the enemy: Loneliness   

Merriam Webster online dictionary defines loneliness as: being without company; cut off from others.   

Loneliness is a major tactic of the enemy in the life of a believer.  His goal is to keep us isolated and discouraged, feeling alone in our struggles so that he can defeat us.   He understands the adage: there is safety in numbers.  In this study we will look at the lives of three men in the Bible who each struggled with loneliness and how they dealt with it.  We will then look at strategies we can use to overcome loneliness. 

To begin, we will look at the prophet Elijah.  

In 1 Kings 18 we read the amazing account of Elijah defeating the 450 prophets of Baal.  Following the greatest of all victories in Elijah’s life, we flip over to chapter 19 where we find him hiding from Jezebel in the wilderness. In his despair he asked God if he can just die. 1 Kings 19:4b, And he asked that he might die, saying, “It is enough; now, O Lord, take away my life, for I am no better than my fathers.” (ESV) 

This does not sound like the voice of victory, but rather the voice of defeat.  As we continue reading in chapter 19, we come to the crux of the matter, 1 Kings 19:9b-10, “What are you doing here, Elijah?” He said, “I have been very jealous for the Lord, the God of hosts. For the people of Israel have forsaken your covenant, thrown down your altars, and killed your prophets with the sword, and I, even I only, am left, and they seek my life, to take it away.” (ESV) Elijah was struggling with fear and loneliness.    

After every spiritual victory the enemy will try to discourage us.  Here we see that he hit Elijah with fear and loneliness. Elijah took the bait, hook, line, and sinker which caused him to feel even more isolated and defeated.   

Next, we will look at King David.   

In the Book of 1 Samuel, we are given the account of David fleeing and hiding from King Saul.  Saul who had been anointed King of Israel, had rejected God by disobeying His commands.  God removed the His anointing from Saul and had put it on the shepherd boy David.  Out of jealousy, Saul had sought to kill David on many occasions.  David, to preserve his life, had been forced to leave his home, family, and friends to hide in caves in the wilderness from Saul.  It is during one of these times of hiding that David wrote Psalm 25 and 142, along with others.  

Psalm 25:16, Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted. (ESV) 

Psalm 142 

1 With my voice I cry out to the Lord; with my voice I plead for mercy to the Lord. 

2 I pour out my complaint before him, I tell my trouble before him. 

3 When my spirit faints within me, you know my way! In the path where I walk, they have hidden a trap for me. 

4 Look to the right and see: there is none who takes notice of me; no refuge remains to me; no one cares for my soul. 

5 I cry to you, O Lord; I say, “You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living.” 

6 Attend to my cry, for I am brought very low! Deliver me from my persecutors, for they are too strong for me! 

7 Bring me out of prison, that I may give thanks to your name! The righteous will surround me, for you will deal bountifully with me. (ESV) 

In Psalm 25, David acknowledged the loneliness of his heart and asked God to turn to him.  In Psalm 142, David began by pouring out his loneliness and hurt to the Lord, asking for deliverance.  He reminded himself that God is his refuge and portion. He closed the psalm by declaring that he would be surrounded by the righteous because God would take care of him.   

Unlike Elijah who wallowed in his loneliness, David acknowledged it, poured it out before the Lord, and then encouraged his soul from his understanding of and history with the Lord.  This was not David’s first rodeo.  He had lived a life of solitude as a shepherd.  As the youngest of his father’s sons, he was relegated to tending the sheep while his older brothers were off serving in Saul’s army.  He understood loneliness, but he also understood God’s faithfulness.   

Our final example is Paul. 

2 Timothy 4:16-18, At my first defense no one came to stand by me, but all deserted me. May it not be charged against them! But the Lord stood by me and strengthened me, so that through me the message might be fully proclaimed and all the Gentiles might hear it. So I was rescued from the lion's mouth. The Lord will rescue me from every evil deed and bring me safely into his heavenly kingdom. To him be the glory forever and ever. (ESV) 

Here we see a glimpse into the loneliness that Paul felt when he stood trial for his faith. No one came to speak in his defense.  He, however, like Jesus, asked that their failure to stand with him not be counted against them.  He understood that he was not alone, but Christ was with him all the time. He understood that he had a friend who sticks closer than a brother (Proverbs 18:24).   

We know from reading the final verse of 2 Timothy 4 that Paul had friends around him.  God raised up fellow believers to be there to comfort and minister to Paul.  God never abandons his children.   

How then do we overcome loneliness? 

First, we, like David, must acknowledge our loneliness.   

We must deal with the reality that everyone faces loneliness at times.  Dr. David Jeremiah said, “It isn’t wrong to visit loneliness, but it is wrong to move in and let loneliness take over our lives.”    We must not wallow in our loneliness like Elijah, because when we do, we open the door for the enemy to pile on fear, doubt, discouragement.... We must identify loneliness for what it is and face it head on.              

Second, we must seek intimacy with Christ.   

We, like Paul, must remind ourselves that we have a friend who sticks closer than a brother.  We must, like David, encourage our soul by reminding ourselves that God is faithful.  We must remember the times in the past when He answered the cry of our heart.   

God is not offended by our weakness or our honesty with Him.  If you are feeling lonely, tell Him! Ask for peace and be open to receiving it because He loves to give good gifts to His kids.  (Matthew 7:11) Never allow the enemy to tell you that God is not concerned with your loneliness. 

1 Peter 3:12, “For the eyes of the Lord are [looking favorably] upon the righteous (the upright), And His ears are attentive to their prayer (eager to answer), But the face of the Lord is against those who practice evil.” (AMP) 

Remember, you are never alone!! Jesus is always with you! 

Psalm 27:10, Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord will hold me close. (NLT) 

Finally, we must reach out to other believers.  

Psalm 68:6a says, God places the lonely in families; he sets the prisoners free and gives them joy. (NLT) God knew that even though we know He is with us, sometimes we just need someone “with flesh on”!  We need other members of the body of Christ.   

One of the first things the enemy will try to do when we acknowledge our loneliness is to convince us that others are too busy, or we will be bothering them if we reach out.  He will try to get us to isolate ourselves, which in turn will add to greater loneliness and a deeper sense of isolation.  If he can get us to isolate, he will be able to wear down our self-worth and sense of belonging.  This will then begin to wear away at our faith and trust in God.  We will then find ourselves growing bitter and offended at our church family members because, “They don’t care about me, or they would reach out.”  

This is a lie! I do not know anyone at my church or in my circle of Christian friends who is selfish and uncaring. I do, however, understand that they, like me, are busy with their life and their own struggles and they are probably not aware when I am struggling. I need to be willing to reach out when I am lonely rather than assuming I am being ignored or overlooked.   

It is important for members of the body of Christ to be watchful for the needs of those around us.  By allowing Holy Spirit to lead us in discernment and wisdom we will be dialed in to God’s heart toward others.  However, this does not remove the responsibility from each of us to reach out.  When you know you are struggling, call up a friend and invite them for coffee.  Maybe you will be meeting their need for companionship as well!   

In conclusion, when we are struggling with loneliness, we must acknowledge our loneliness, seek intimacy with Christ, and reach out to other believers.  We cannot let the enemy cause us to isolate and wallow in our loneliness!